the old chair

Posted by e. barrett | Posted on 06-08-2008

Category : different, live for the eternal

Tags: , , , , ,

 

I was thinking about something today, and it’s not exactly theology, so humor me for a bit.  As much as I’ve tried to escape the reality of age, I am finally coming to the depressing conclusion I’m getting older.  I have reached that stage of my life where my body simply doesn’t respond like it once did.  (And it never returns my phone calls.)

Some of you know what I’m talking about.  Others of you are just waiting for me to discuss walking uphill both ways in the snow.  (By the way, I did this when I was going to high school – there was a valley between my house and the HS.)  As my body changes, the way I think about things is also changing.  You see, sitting here typing this is causing me physical pain because I have an old chair.

Until recently I had never given any consideration to my posture, how I sit, or certainly not what I sit on.  But that’s changing.  The obvious solution is to buy a new chair.  And that would be great, if I hadn’t just resigned from my job.  So right now I can’t afford to buy some fancy, comfortable, ergonomically correct chair. 

When I chose to resign I knew there would be sacrifice involved.  Although this wasn’t exactly what I expected! 

As I sit here thinking about my chair, my job, and my back I can’t help but realize I’m still in better financial shape than 99% of the world’s population.  At least I have a chair to sit on.  This is forcing me to think about the so-called “less fortunate.”  Have I ever stopped to consider the physical pain they go through because they can’t afford new clothes, a warm bed, or even a car to get to work?  Have I stopped to wonder what random issues they have because they don’t have the money they need?

For the first time I think I’m starting to understand that suffering sometimes happens just because we can’t afford to “upgrade” the things we have.  That it’s not simply about “not having” but also about not have the right things.  Owning a pair of shoes doesn’t do you any good if they are a size too small. 

Like I said, this isn’t exactly theological in nature.  Just an observation about the weird ways life (and God) teaches you important lessons.

a homeless soul

1

Posted by e. barrett | Posted on 21-07-2008

Category : God, choice, faith, taking action

Tags: , , , , , , ,

  

I never know what to do when I meet someone who is homeless.  I find myself torn between two desires.  On the one hand I want to “make a difference.”  I want to help this person, because I recognize their suffering, and no one should have to suffer alone.  But at the same time I don’t think it does any good to give someone money if they are just going to use it on drugs or alcohol.  That’s not help.  Yet the Bible is filled with examples of generous love being given to people who don’t deserve it.  So how do you respond?  How do you walk the razor’s edge?

This weekend I was reminded of my dilemma.  While eating out with some friends we were approached by a homeless man.  He was clearly on drugs, and he admitted as much when he asked for money.  After an awkward pause we refused to help him.

I honestly don’t know if this was the right answer.  Maybe there was something more we could have done.  But this wasn’t our first conversation with this man.  Only a few weeks earlier he had asked us for the same thing (bus money).  Back then it was clear that he was on drugs.  At that time we decided to reach out to him, spend some time with him, and see if we could help.  As we talked to him (and bought him lunch) we offered to get him help that would make a difference.

He admitted he needed to clean up his life, but refused our help.  Insisting that all he “really” needed was some bus money and sleep.  It struck me then, as it did this week, that this is someone who knows he has a problem.  He’s not an idiot.  He doesn’t want to live on the streets.  And yet he keeps making the same decisions.  He keeps turning to the drugs and lifestyle that prevents him from getting the help he knows he needs.

In other words, he sounds just like me.

The only difference is my homelessness isn’t physical, it’s spiritual.  I may look great on the outside, but I know if I don’t guard myself, my soul all too easily becomes corrupted.  If I don’t constantly seek out help I can become angry, resentful, and filled with pride.  When I don’t take the help that’s offered to me my heart becomes hard, and some of the light goes out of my life.

While believing in Jesus is all that is required to be “saved”, that’s not all that God wants for us.  He doesn’t want the bare minimum.  He wants us to grow and to be changed.  Unfortunately we sometimes reject that path.  We sometimes tell God, “yes I understand my life is filled with sin.  But I just don’t want to change.”  And that’s a dangerous place to be.

It’s easy to look at someone less fortunate and feel pity for them.  It’s easy to start feeling superior.  But I think in some ways this homeless man has an easier path – at least he knows he’s homeless.  How often do I think everything is great in my life, when in fact my soul is homeless?